In the middle of the Ocean

                                                               ( Feb 13 )

                               In the middle of the Ocean


                         

                                   In the middle of an endless Ocean

                                   No islands, no boats...

                                   Nothing passes by any more

                                    Bobbing up and down endlessly

                                    with the perpetual movement of the waves

                                    fighting to keep afloat

                                    Nowhere to hold on to

                                    No place to navigate to

                                    Just bobbing up and down

                                    In the middle of an endless Ocean

                                    Following the perpetual movement of the waves

                                    One day ... Only the waves will remain

                                    and the faint memory of a tormented soul...  

                                                 

Life's Benevolence

                                        (February 11)

                           Life's Benevolence
     
                      

                  For a while now Life's circumstances have denied me

                  of Things and People i Loved,

                  Enjoyed and Identified with.

                  I made the very human unwise error

                  to instead of accepting and letting go

                  - as i eventually had to -

                  to struggle and try to chase and replace

                  with what would  or could Not possibly

                  be the same as what was taken away

                  -thus experiencing the loss twice.

                  Yet the replacement is only a perception of the mind

                  which creates material limitations and differentiations.

                  Every Person, every Face, every Smile,

                  every Word, every Heart and every Sentiment Shared

                  is like a Ray from the Sun

                  created by the same Source that created us all

                  myself, my Loved ones, and everyone else alike

                  and this is where i found Life's Benevolence

                  grateful for receiving what - and when- needed

                  in this unique magnificent way

                  of Life Connecting a Rich array of Human threads.

                                                    *  *  *

                                      I feel the Clock ticking

                          anxious i am not where i want to be

                                      before i am no more.

                                            One by one ...

                          Barriers and illusions are falling...

                                        

No One is Given More than they Can Bear ? ? ?

                                                                         ( Jan 13 )

                No One is Given More than they Can Bear ? ? ?

                           

                                It Sounds Comforting

                                but does it meet with Reality?

                                Reality Indicates many Tormented Souls

                                Buckle Under the weight ‘given’ them

                                and some Force a Premature End to their lives...

                                So then the Challenging Questions would be:

  

                                * How True is the dictum

                                * Who or what determines it IS True

                                * Who or What determines How Much Can be Given

                                * Who or What determines How Much Can One Bear

                                * Who IS the Giver and Why

                                * What is the Purpose of being given a ‘Lot’ to Bear

                                 

                                * How much of the 'Lot' is caused by

                                   Personal Unconscious Contributions

                                   due to harsh upbringing environment

                                   negative beliefs, detrimental patterns

                                           and so on...

                                                 

                                       

His Guitar

                                                       

( Jan 13 )

For The Man in My Life

His Guitar

 

Wounded

( June 08 )

Wounded 

No knife more fatally wounding

than the one delivered

by the hand of a loved one.

I hurt once more

but I know

I will soon forget again...

 

“ In Tune...”

“ In Tune...”

This Tiger...

Loves this Moment!...

When Reality ceases to be

                     
                 When Reality ceases to be...


                    I am sleeping...

                         

                    Not quite dreaming

                    Just vaguely aware of some brain activity

                    going on in the background

                   I am not aware of waking reality

                   as to who i am or anything connected to existence

                   Then i wake up

                   and i remember the brain activity

                   and connect with waking reality

                   This makes me think:

           Awareness of waking reality only exists when awake...

                   If i never woke up

                   the brain activity would have ceased

                   and so would have the memory of the waking reality

                   Could this be a Peaceful Death?...

Sonia and I...

Sonia...

The Doll that Fondly Reminds me of my Mother

A Birthday Present she had sent to my younger daughter

when she was a four year old little girl...

 

Somehow i liked her more than my daughter did...

 and she has been with me for years.
When i knew she was mine
i named her Sonia in her Memory.

 I sat down for a few minutes

and fell asleep next to her

in an upright position 

and a highly strained neck...

I had not anticipated dozing off

and had not supported my head

When i woke up i looked at her

by my side, half falling onto me

and a quick thought

passed through my head

like the fleeting site of a flying bird:

‘Sonia and I will soon be together...’

Did i see a big smile of relief on her face?...

Did i feel a cuddly nudge on my skinny arm?...

I don’t know... i think i did..

When i looked at her again she looked just like a Doll

being inside her own silent world...

In the mean time
we have put our Christmas lights on
since last time on 2009      

                                 

Poor camera quality and light but rich imagination

and I am enjoying them like a four year old little girl

because somewhere in there i am one...

and because i Know...

 

Expression through Creativity have been my Coloured lights

My recent Favourite (Nov 12)

Shifting Sands

                                                                              

The Whisper...

The Whisper...

Sitting comfortably in my armchair

beside my beloved man

sawing quietly a pillow case.

Then a sudden thought enters my mind:

what if Death whispered in your ear

“Tonight is your last Night”

what would you do then?

The answer was instant, clear and without hesitation:

“Pretty much continuing as i am doing now

except perhaps with a mild feeling of apprehension

and a lot of keen anticipation...”

A Little Candle

Nov 12

A Little Candle

There is still a little Candle alight in my brain

that allows me to think and write

It has resisted the Blowing winds

I wonder for how long...

A Wish!...

A Wish...

How i wish for the Light to Deem out

Then Close my eyes....

  

And say 

‘ Good night’

Forever...

Shadows

Shadows

 

The Evening Sun of my Childhood

returning once more

with hues of loss and mourning

                                                           

The Night wrapping its cold arms

around unbearable grief and pain

Death is waiting

Or is it waiting for death....

My Man’s Protective Love

His  Protective Love...

 As my time now draws closer and closer to the end

My Man’s Constant Caring and Protective Love

Is Always Like a Pair of great Wings Above me!  

My Only One

Dedicated To My Man

                        My Man is the Most Noble Person i have ever known.

                                  Always True to his Principles and Beliefs

                Never faltered once in all those years we have been together

               no matter how trying the times or circumstances may have been.

           One real Diamond of Integrity enhanced with a pure Heart of Gold!

                                            I am a Very Lucky Woman....

Ocean Meditation

Ocean Meditation

                                         

The Ocean

My Heart and Soul

Mind and Body

Eternal   

Shimmering Universe 

*

From the Ocean I Emerged

And there I shall Return

My Love  A Seashell in the Sand

                                                
                                                               ~ Tigress Eye~

                                                                    * * * * *

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